Top Ten Worst Bands Ever
So most of the posts that I do are pretty positive and upbeat, but I think sometimes it is good to release some negative energy on the world. With the holiday season coming up I think I better release that negativity now. What better way to do that than to bash some bands that have contributed to the “dumbing down” of the American music fan. For the most part these are more recent bands and I tried to stick to rock because I’m sure that if I venture into pop I would find too many terrible bands and couldn’t make a list. This is just my personal opinion and you don’t have to agree…but for your sake I hope you do.
So here…we…go…
10. Fall Out Boy-I think the main reason they make this list is not so much because they are bad musicians, but because their music is too damned catchy and I am sick of catching myself humming their music. Oh, and most of all because they butchered Beat It.
9. Simple Plan-I have a simple plan…never buy their albums. This might have been the band that started the whole Emo movement. You know what Layne Staley did when he was down…heroin. You want to know what Kurt Cobain did…blew his head off. These were guys with real issues that bleed through into their music. Most of these newer bands just bitch about mommy and daddy not loving them. But I guess when you’re 12 and you think mommy and daddy don’t love you then this type of music is perfect for you.
8. Jethro Tull-3 words sum up why they are on this list….Best Metal Grammy
7. Hawthorne Heights-This is one of the main offenders of the Emo movement. The whole screamer/singer combo just never did it for me. Ohio is not for lovers….it’s for assholes and depressed teens who bought your albums. But I am glad they have had such a long successful career…oh wait they didn’t, my fault.
6. Good Charlotte-Talk about a band whose novelty wore off quick. The catchiness of Lifestyles of the Rich and Famous lasted about a week, yet got played for a year. The band had an opportunity to continue making sub par music and fade into obscurity, but NOOO they had to go and make the same bland, poor me poor me, kiddie music that gets played on the radio nonstop. They went from Blink 182 rip-offs to Emo rip-offs. I really wish that the Madden brothers would just stick to dating Hilary Duff and Nicole Ritchie and never make another record…EVER!
5. Blue October-So apparently all I need to do to get on the radio is play re-hashed riffs and sing badly…sweet!!! If you have any questions about this band please go listen to the song Hate Me…read the lyrics…and honestly ask yourself if that is good music. Hate Me makes me do exactly that…hate myself for wasting 4 minutes of my life.
4. Hinder-I think a little lyrical analysis ought to prove my point about this band. Example number one, “Lets go home and get stoned, we could end up making love instead of misery. Go home and get stoned cause the sex is so much better when you’re mad at me.” Shakespeare would be proud. Let’s not even get into Lips of an Angel. The sad thing about this band and its lyrics is that they are serious about them. When Scott Weiland, Julian Casablancas, or Perry Ferrell write totally odd ball lyrics, you can usually catch the fact that they don’t take themselves too serious. What’s even worse is the drunk people at the bars who think these guys are really deep and their music is so amazing. Get real people.
3. Insane Clown Posse-Where to even start with these guys. I thought maybe after Eminem trashed them on “Marshal Mathers” that we might never again have to hear about sodomizing chickens and Faygo. But of course not, they continue to make terrible records. These guys should stick to their wrestling league, because at least then they have a good excuse to dress up in makeup and look like jerk-offs (Nothing against wrestling because I am a fan myself). For fear of being attacked by some Juggalos, I will not say anything more about them.
2. Creed/Scott Stapp-Now I guess I can tolerate the first album even though it amounts to nothing more than a cheap Pearl Jam imitation, but it did have a few decent songs like One and My Own Prison. But even then you could see that they had nothing new to offer and they were using the same riffs that Bush already recycled form the Grunge era. For as much as I love grunge, I hate what it became, and I think Creed best embodies that. As soon as Scott Stapp decided that he was the second coming of Christ, the band took a turn into shittsville. Songs like One Last Breathe, Higher, and My Sacrifice symbolize exactly what sucks about the post-grunge era. I think that maybe my disdain for Creed comes from my dislike for Scott Stapp. Never in my life have I seen such a pompous asshole. This guy is the perfect example of being holier-than-thou.
1. Nickelcrap…I mean Nickelback.
I mean this with everything in my soul, this band is the worst band ever. I will say one thing though, they have managed to perfect one song….and then change the lyrics and release it 10 more times. Their riffs, chord progressions, and rhythm rarely stretch out too far from basic formula of How You Remind Me. The song Rock Star actually makes me ill when I listen to it, and I honestly think if you put the words Rock Star in a song, assholes will love it. I once asked a friend of mine why he likes Nickelback and his answer was “cause you don’t have to think when you listen to them.” There couldn’t have been a more perfect answer then that one. People don’t like to think, and God forbid that music be complicated and intricate and actually make them think about something other than being a rock star, getting drunk, and screwing some strippers. When Nickelback tries to be serious with songs like If Everyone Cared, they convince these musically challenged listeners that they are deep and thoughtful musicians. Well if everyone cared then your shit wouldn’t get played on the radio.
So there it is. I am sure a lot of people will disagree with me and have some suggestions of their own, but the best thing about this country is that I have the freedom to voice my opinion. And I also realize that people have the freedom to listen to whatever they want. All I ask is that you take a look at these bands and really ask yourself what they have done to significantly contribute to the music industry beyond selling records. Listen to the songs and analyze the lyrics with an open mind and then if you still like them…so be it.
BONUS SECTION
With all of these terrible bands I had to leave some out and some barely missed the cut…so here are some honorable mentions:
Papa Roach
Buckcherry….only missing the list because I Love The Cocaine…I Love The Cocaine. That is one damn catchy song. Note…I personally don’t love the cocaine or any other drug.
Alter Bridge…Creed’s guitarist…you can paint a turd gold but it’s still a turd.
Lifehouse…I guess you can’t beat up on Christian Rock bands too much
Slipknot…honestly how many band members do you need
Jefferson Starship…they built this city on shit. How did the Airplane turn into that???
Van Hagar…just kidding, I’m just a Diamond Dave guy to the end
Phish…I guess because I don’t smoke weed I can’t get into this band.
Kudos for having the courage to call out Nickelback. But can’t agree on Jethro Tull.
Pretty good list but not much out of this decade what about the 60s 70s 80s and 90s. (Jethro Tull and ICP of course)
The Presidents of the United States of America is everything a post-grunge ban should be (I’m talkin to you, Creed!). Another thing should be added about Creed so Creed fans don’t go pee pee their diapers. Their guitarist, Mark Tremonti, knows how to write a lick (See ‘One’). Some of the band’s songs like ‘What If,’ ‘What’s This Life For?,’ and ‘Bullets’ are oh so close. But watch their videos and read their lyrics. They’re … off. It should be noted that, like JD, I similarly like ‘My Own Prison,’ but Creed fans…. You’re band is a shitshow.
About Jethro Tull
You’re gonna have to bring more to the table if you’re trying to tell me Jethro Tull sucks. There have been many Grammy offenses over the years ( Celine Dion over Smashing Pumpkins; Lionel Richie over Bruce Springsteen and Prince; Blood, Sweat, and Tears over the Beatles!; Toto over Paul McCartney, Billy Joel, and John Mellencamp! I could do this for HOURS). The only thing this proves is that the Grammy Awards Sucks! and we all already knew that. And actually, Jethro Tull did not even show up to the Grammy Awards Ceremony that year, but Metallica did. Apparently Metallica put a lot of their eggs in the Grammy basket (they have 5, i think). But like I stated before, noone should give a shit about the Grammys.
Now, JD, let me tell you some things about Jethro Tull that you must not be aware of:
They formed in 1963! As in, Ian Anderson has been playing a flute in a rock band since 1963. Its not some flash-in-the-pan gimmick. They played Woodstock, Monterey Pop Festival, and Isle of Weight Festival in the 60′s.
Tommy Iommi, guitaris for Black Sabbath, was in Jethro Tull before Black Sabbath fame. And he credits his time with Jethro Tull for making him the guitarist he was in Black Sabbath.
Their album went to #1 on the UK charts in 1969 (not an easy task). Other #1 selling artists in 1969: The Beatles, Diana Ross, The Temptations, Cream, The Moody Blues, Bob Dylan, Elvis Presley, Blind Faith, The Rolling Stones.
In conclusion, I note that they have released over 20 studio albums, so they’re gonna have some turds. Look at Carlos Santana. the Legend. He’s released almost 30 Studio albums and not one was good since 1973. Jethro Tull has made a huge contribution to rock music. They are credited with creating Progressive Rock along with contemporaries King Crimson, the Nice, and YES. And if you still think they suck, go listen to Locomotive Breath. How many of their albums do you have again?
Apparently Jethro Tull has quite a few fans…I put them up more as a joke than anything because lets face it, guys in rock bands playing flutes is pretty funny. I don’t personally like them but I’m not saying they are bad musicains. The rest of the list however….total shit
First off, wow ferrari did enough research on this to make a history major proud…his argument is pretty flawless….that being said damnit JD stick up for ur picks … this is just like when chris called u out on being a fair weather fan…take a page from the ben francis book…even if you’re wrong you defend that it as if you were absolutely right……. if you are reading the ben francis biography look at the chapter entitled “Leave me in Bridgeville” god grow a pair
ps i love top 10 lists and would like for you to make more to create convos….did anyone see the top 10 male singers on vh1 classic i could complain for hours about that
pps look at that picture of the turd from nickelback … i am stating this theory that i have had for years if you do the devil horns rock sign….you are a douche and not a rockstar
Ben you are absolutely right….i bitched out. I think you know exactly how i feel about Jethro Tull. So Fuck ‘em I think they are terrible and that is that. If you play a flute and your band made Aqualung, you are shit!
comon!!!! fuck cherry is the worst band ever! I will disagree til the end of days. i would rather listen to the new slipknot cd 7 times in a row, that listen to too drunk to fuck once (unless its by the dead kennedys of course)! i think you should make them honorary number 1. just consider it, thats all i ask.
GREAT LIST! Although I have to say… I saw Jethro Tull a couple years ago, and they were “OK.” They had a violin player (who now plays with Vai), and she made the show for me. She has more telent then the whole band put together.
But if it were my list, I’d remove Jethro Tull and place Nirvana in it’s place. Nirvana sums up everything I hate in a horrible band. It may sound harsh, but when Curt Cobain offed himself, he did the music community a great favor. And WHY did he ever grace the pages of Guitar World? He had to go, sorry Nirvana fans…
I should also mention, I’d have to add Metallica to this list. They rocked in the 80′s, but slowly, I watched my favorite metal band turn in to women. St. Anger, along with Some Kind of Monster, summed up my greatest fears about them. They became uppity, hollywood women. Complaining about how hard life is when you are filthy rich. Metallica… Screw you!
just to shed some light on hinder, they are a band from my area and they have always sucked. but what america heard was an album that was completely written by the lead singer of nickelback and produced by that guy as well. the record company just wanted another nickelback and thought hinder had the correct look, kind of a milli vanilli sort of thing. when hinder writes their own stuff they suck in a completely different way.
good list and yeah hinder sucks bigtime
http://www.theperishablepress.com/2009/09/why-ever-are-they-somewhat-famous.html
dude wtf…. i agree about the blue october, fall out boy, nickleback, and those other ones, but ICP is actually good, i dont give a shit about what you say, just because eminem dissed them out on his CD, they got him back really hard on “Eminem’s Mom” and a few other songs, and, by “chickens” they are referring to rednecks, listen to the song ass tard, also Faygo is the shit
trust me buddy i know all about ICP i was being a smart ass about the Chicken’s part…I have heard chicken huntin and their other songs. I don’t just put a band on the list without knowing their material. Sorry to break it to you, but they suck. No offense to the Juggalos haha
Hey dude, I agree with all the bands mentioned.
I esp. HATE HATE HATE Hinder….ugn stupid rock star cliches…
But come on dude, on your honorable mentions, you have to remove Alter Bridge…otherwise, every band in the HM are ok.
But lead singer of A.B has some amazing pipes and Tremonti can play his guitar…sure Creed sucked but not Alter Bridge…
Here, he’s not bad in this vid: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ZFMS2UHMbq4&feature=related
Alter Bridge is great. It’s actually all of the original members of Creed, but with a different singer.
I disagree about Nickelback I personally followed their career since They released “How you remind me”, and after hearing all their albums since there and comparing them to other band like rolling stones, U2, iron maiden, Rise Against- I think that it’s really good rock, not splendid one, but really nice to hear, and I disagree either about ‘not thinking wile listening’. I really like for example “Fight for all wrong reasons”, and ” just to get high”, they’re very powerful both in meaning and in sound. I won’t tell that I did enjoyed as much every song, but most of them are really nice and catchy.
In your comment there was no real arguments why this band need to be bashed, but you put way too much emotions which made this article not competent and reliable.
And they didn’t give and same song, There is difference between theirs songs like Too bad, Saving me, Rockstar. If you think it’s one and the same then, really I’d advice you to clear your ears from wax.
Yet I must notice that this just typical rock, and they like typical rock, very thanks to them I can enjoy my time, and when I want go into nostalgic mood, get something more unique then I listen to Coldplay ;f
It’s just a matte of taste and mood. But don’t bash this band just because it’s popular, popular doesn’t always mean it’s bad. I think that they do good rock, really worth to listen. And I like the fact that Chad is writing text by himself.
So I think you shouldn’t call this article “10 worst bands” but “10 bands I hate”. Because after reading this article there was no real arguments which would ensure ma that this band is bad. It’s just you and your taste in music.
Kal, how in the hell can you compare Nickelback to Iron Maiden? Seriously? This comment thread now reeks of fanboy.
Also, for future reference, when you’re trolling sites who bash Nickelback, leaving comments that are incoherent and grammatically butchered helps your cause very little.
Kal, you do realize that YOUR entire argument also had absolutely no real argument other than your opinion? And the fact that he never once stated that he hates Nickelback because they’re popular? Also his “argument” (because it’s really more a fact than anything else) on Nickelback was that all their songs sound the same (which is true), and they have no real musical talent. Also why should he change the title of the post? He stated in the beginning that this is his personal opinion….
Oh wait I get it…you don’t know how to read.
Listen Kal, Nickelback brings nothing of true value to the music industry. They are just more of the same post-grunge crap that is force fed down our throats everyday on the radio. Please don’t ever put their name in the same sentence as the Rolling Stones who are all actually very talented musicians. Nickelback is full of average musicians who write very similar songs over and over and have horrible lyrical content. “I like your pants around your feet”, “That shit makes me bat shit crazy, We’ve got no fear, no doubt, all in balls out”, every lyric in Rockstar…I could go on for days. The worst part is people accept this as good music!! However, you are entitled to your opinion as am I, but please make valid points. And in case you missed it, there is a good bit of sarcasm and humor in making this post
I have nothing personally against them and wish them good health and long life, however, I just plain can not stand to listen to Jethro Tull or Toll or whatever they are called…Whenever one of their songs comes on the radio I change the channel…I don’t have any explanation for my dislike of the music except to say that I find listening to the music, the voice of that dude who sings it, that flute and what not is distasteful to me and always has been and always will be. So, to Jethro Toll I politely say…Go FUCK yourselves.
I agree crapper.. That’s exactly where Jethro Tull belongs.. In the crapper. It is definately Tull, not Toll, and only Toe once. I hate the Manson like looks that come from Ians face, after he prances around on stage like a wood elf. If you like Jethro, then you probably like Steely Dan; and that is enough said.
You have bad bands but only ICP should be in a top ten list.
Also Fall Out Boy is great once you look past the singles. Blue October and Jethro Tull are great too. A perfect bad band list would be:
10. Kesha
9. Jonas Brothers
8. Lil Wayne
7. Insane Clown Posse
6. Miley Cyrus
5. Justin Bieber
4. 3OH!3
3. Attack Attack!
2. Millionaires
1. Brokencyde